This loneliness is deep!

Wow, (almost the most usual word I use, not sure whether it is even a word) I am feeling the slice of the knife this afternoon. I am feeling the shrieking hollow in my heart right now, short of leaking my eyes off I am trying to avoid sappy songs.

I miss him. I never miss someone that badly. Or at least I dun remember missing someone that much. But I am ok. I am fine. This is a great feeling.  I finally having a strong emotional attachment in a very very long time. It's not really an odd thing for me but I am sure 99% of the world population would understand what I am going through. 

Attachment with someone is an age-old story. Two falls in love, two can't stop thinking of the other, and two just can't wait to see each other again. When I was waching my Private Structure underwear I have a pang of de ja vu. I remember the hardcore of missing was when I was in my preteens, during our school holidays my cousins and I were dumped at our grandparents. We had so much good times with our grandparents that on the day when we were brought away by my parents, I can still see it vivid in my eyes, the tear just well up, like open dam. Surprisingly my father saw me and were nonchalant about it. None of the "ah u ok?" and "you had a great time huh?". I of course know the whole story afterwards.