Why can;t I write composition whenever I want to? What stops me from writing a masterpiece anyway? Why do I need to wait for 'the right time' to write one composition a day? Is it so impossible to pen or type one article a day? What so hard about it?
One time I was daydreaming about a 'what if' situation. What if I were to be able to do whatever I can, without thinking about restrictions, would I be able to come out with ideas that's fresh and creative? This fantasizing at dusk happened when I read an article about Olympics and that Zhang Yimou, the famous director who gave us Du Jou and Raise the Red Lantern, came out with the whole concept of the opening ceremony of the Olympics which going to be aired in more than 100 channels worldwide watched possibly by 1.5billions people, not to mention the lucky 100,000 spectators who got to buy the opening tickets at as much as USD 1500 in eBay!! Well I was asking myself, why Zhang Yi Mou was picked and not the guy next to him when he was perhaps eating Mc DOnalds in this restaurant somewhere in Beijing, or why can't I be picked?
Well for obvious reason why that temporary neighbour in that most famous yellow emblem restaurant did not get to direct the opening ceremony is because he did not want it. But I want it! I want to do it because I believe I can!
Two reasons throw my case out of the peony garden paper window;
1. Zhang Yi Mou is a proven case of talent personified. He has track record which spans the time of yore, before I even heard of the word art-house to the very moment where I am itching to watch the opening ceremony of the long-awaited Beijing Olympics.
2. Most important of all, I have not shown to be talented. I couldn't even come out with a winning case of Tall Tales!! I am just not talented, period!! Why I fail to look at this is beyond me.
How could I not see this is over my intelligence level. See!! I couldn;t even see this stuff. I have not proven my own track record yet I have this split second moment for awhile actually believed that I could have done it and done a better job..
Better job! Have I seen Zhang's work yet? Not yet, the show has not even begun!! What makes u say you are able to outshine him? YOu can't even write an interesting article about this...
BUt I believe I could do it!!
Everytime I was about to do something I have the strongest confidence and urge to act on it... Until I begin, that's where the believe system gone downhill from there. Why is this thing happening to me?
WHat is wrong with me?
Is this the most-talked-about believe beyond doubt, that covers the term blind believe. Is this the famous verb unquestionable believe bordering towards cultism that motivational speakers of yore been extolling about?
I believe so. And yet I am glad I am given such gift.
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